Top Quotes from George Carlin

George Carlin was a famous comedian, actor, and author known for his controversial stand-up comedy routines. Here are some of his most famous quotes:

  1. “Religion has actually convinced people that there’s an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever ’til the end of time! But He loves you.”
  2. “Political correctness is America’s newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance. It presents itself as fairness, yet attempts to restrict and control people’s language with strict codes and rigid rules.”
  3. “It’s the responsible thing to do, to complain. It’s part of your duty as a citizen. You have the right to complain about the government, about the way things are. It’s one of the things that separates us from the other animals, the ability to gripe and moan and whine and bellyache.”
  4. “I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.”
  5. “I’m not concerned about all hell breaking loose, but that a PART of hell will break loose… it’ll be much harder to detect.”
  6. “Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time.”
  7. “The other day, I came across a petition to have all guns banned. It was addressed to the government and the National Rifle Association. And it said, “We, the undersigned, demand the government and the NRA work together to ban all guns.” I’m thinking, “Wow, what a great idea! Let’s ask the government and the NRA to ban all guns. That way, only the government and the NRA will have guns.”
  8. “I’ve always believed that if done properly, oral sex could be very dangerous.”
  9. “I’m not a vegetarian because I love animals. I’m a vegetarian because I hate plants.”
  10. “The only way to deal with fear is to face it head on.”

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